I loved this!

My friend Susan (who's one of the "Angels") sent me this video this morning. It's so true! --Kind of like the secret. I feel like my whole new life is an experiment in manifesting what I want. I know I can do it!

Today's audition

Today I have an audition for a great acting gig. It's to deliver singing telegrams! The reason it's great is because 1. It's flexible for auditions. 2. It's income (and pretty good money!) 3. It will be an opportunity to be seen by Hollywood people who can hire me! Marsha (the woman who runs the company) said they do lots of studios and entertainment companies! This will be great! Wish me luck!

Happy Valentines Day!

Rats

I just found out that Fred has a live-in girlfriend! We did a special fundraiser show last night, and she came. Personally, I don't really get what he sees in her. She seems very bland. Not spicy like me! Fred and I have such a strong connection. I feel kind of bad for her.

What's wrong with TV?

So, I'll admit I've been watching a lot of TV. But is that such a bad thing? I mean, it's my profession, so it's necessary. Right? I belong to this women's group. I joined it years ago when I first moved to Los Angeles. We call ourselves the Angels. (Sort of like each other's guardian Angel). Well, the Angels think that the problem with me watching so much TV is that it takes away from me being out in the world, and interacting more with live people. I don't know. I'm happy here in my little place.

I'm a working actress!

So this is the second weekend of our show. So far so good! I'm having a blast. My part is really small, but I'm okay with that. I mean everyone has to start somewhere. I keep asking Sammy if maybe she can throw me a line, but she said that it's not typical to do that once the show's up and running. Oh well. You can't blame a gal for tryin'! Fred is really funny. I think I have a crush on him. There's a lot of subtext with our characters, and it's more than just acting. I think we have a really strong connection. And he is hot! HOT, baby! I'm going to tell him I'm attracted to him next week. That's a commitment I'm making.

Feeling blue

I'm feeling down today. I love my weekends, now that I have the play, but the weekdays are another story. I'm just not sure what to do with myself. I know I should get a roomate, but I don't have the energy to look for anyone right now. And where would I start? Maybe I'll make a commitment to do that next week. Maybe I just need to feel what I'm feeling and it will pass... And today I'm feeling blue.

Opening Night!

Dress rehearsal was a disaster. But they said that a bad dress rehearsal means a great show. And it's true! Oh, it was such an amazing experience. I love this show. I love being on stage. The show is amazing! And...we got a standing ovation! This really is my true calling. Quitting my day job was the best thing I ever did. And if I ever forget that all I have to do is think about tonight: When those lights lits me up, out there in my costume, singing my heart out, along-side my talented fellow actors, nothing could be more right! sigh...

OH, and guess what else?! I didn't realize this, but this is equity-waiver. What does that mean, you ask? I am getting paid!!!!! It's not alot ($10/performance) but it's something! I'm a working actress. I'm doin' it! I livin' the dream!

And the good news is that this show runs indefinitely! Wooooooooooooooooo!

Still depressed.

Feeling depressed again today.
P.S. It's day 17 of being unemployed.

Dress Rehearsal

The big day is almost here! My show is so neat. It's called "Hell is Here" The Musical. It's a moving and philosophical story about teens dealing with drug abuse and suicide. Sammy did a really fantastic job directing it. I'm in a scene with God. Ha ha. This photo is one of my fellow performers, Fred. He's pretty cute, don't ya think? (wink wink!) It's been very fun, and I CAN'T WAIT for tomorrow night! We have our first "preview" performance. And then the show OPENS ON THURSDAY!!!! weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

What was I thinking?

This morning I told my dad about the play. I don't know why I did that. Why did I do that? I should know better. He just doesn't understand what I'm going through. I'm so upset. Why does it only seem important to him if I'm getting paid?! I'm doing what I LOVE. I'm doing what I was born to do! He doesn't even know I quit my job yet. Thank God I haven't told him yet. I'm going to wait until I've made it as an actor with a steady pay check... I know he means well, but I don't want to hear his fears about my decision. I just need to be around positive people who can support my choices now... This is the hardest thing I've ever done!

angels reaction

Okay this happened before, and it's really been bothering me. I belong to this women's group called THE ANGELS.

When I told them they didn't seem overly happy for me.

Why I Love My TV

1. It's always there when I need it.
2. It's entertaining: It makes me laugh, cry and keeps me informed.
3. It's diverse.
4. It's inexpensive
5. It teaches me my craft
6. It gives me things to talk about with other people.
7. It's always on time.
8. It doesn't care how I'm dressed or what I look like.
9. It makes me feel good.
10. I can see my future in it.

Day #11

Still depressed... WHAT THE HELL HAVE I DONE?

Day #9

Here it is. Day 9 of being unemployed. I'm feeling down today. I had a few days of being really pumped. But now I'm depressed again. I have this precious gift of time, and don't want to waste a single moment of it! The problem is I'm not exactly sure what to do.

The Budget

OK... So here is my beginning balance: $9,011.62.
This is all the money I have in the world. Bare bones (with no extra comforts) it costs me somewhere around $2000/month to live. So I have about 4.5 months until I'm completely out of money. NOTE: I also have $7,000 worth of credit cards, but I really really don't want to go into debt. That would be bad. So forget that...

IDEAS TO MAKE MONEY LAST LONGER:

1. Get a roommate

2. Get a part-time job (but not until you have to... since it takes away from the main goal. OR get a job in the entertainment industry where I can meet people who'd give me an acting job!) Maybe...

3. Sell the car, and start riding a bike. (Good in theory, especially since it helps the environment, but not practical in terms of getting to auditions)

4. Get rid of home phone and just use my cell phone.

5. Book an acting gig! (Woooooooooo!)

6. Sell old corporate clothes.

7. Sell anything I no longer need. (Good one!)

8. Get ads for this Blog page.

9. Cancel the cable. (Can't really do that. Need the cable to study my craft.)

10. Find a rich person who has nothing better to do with their money than give it to me! (Might be a tough one.)

I feel much better now that I have a plan!

Day #5

Not sure what to do with myself today. Feeling very low energy. I need to do something. --Think I need some sort of a game plan... Maybe I'll take a nap first.

What will I do now?

Feeling depressed. Not really sure what to do with myself. Today is day #3 of being unemployed. I've been sitting home watching TV for 3 days. What have I done?

I got a part in a play!!

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!! I GOT A PART IN A PLAY!
Actually it's a musical!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The name of the play is called "Hell is Here: The Musical". So I'll get to sing too! It's really happening!

Over Christmas I watched this DVD called "The Secret" and I really connected with it. It's all about the laws of attraction. Well it's already working! I'm putting all of my intentions into this, and it's manifesting. Ha! Woooooooooooooooooo!

I think I'll treat myself to an ice cream to celebrate! NO! I must be good! I'm a full-time actress now and have to watch my figure. Well, I guess I can start that tomorrow. :)

My last day of work

This is it. This is it. This is it. My last day.

In eight hours my life will change forever!

It's really here. It's really happening! They're having a little "goodbye cake for me at lunch, and then... I'm not coming back on Monday!

This is the last time I'll ever see this cubby. It's the last time I'll walk down this hallway! Goodbye Telephone. Goodbye coat rack. Goodbye dreary job I hate. You've been good to me. But now it's finally time to say Goodbye old life. And hello Audrey!

exit... stage right.

My 2010 Resolutions

1. Eat more salads
2. Lose 10 pounds
3. Get an acting job
4. Get contact lenses
5. Be more happy and have more fun!
6. Look for the good in people
7. Study my craft
8. Get an agent
9. Get headshots
10. Buy a new terrarium for my turtle

Bringing in the New Year with a Bang